'I felt like I deserved it because I was autistic': Understanding the impact of interpersonal victimisation in the lives of autistic people.
Autistic clients often view abuse as inevitable and mask for safety, so replace compliance training with self-advocacy skills and autistic-led supports.
01Research in Context
What this study did
Pearson et al. (2023) talked with autistic adults about times other people hurt or used them.
The team asked how these events shaped daily life and what help, if any, felt useful.
Interviews were read for common themes; numbers were not the goal.
What they found
Most adults said victimisation felt normal—"I deserved it because I’m autistic."
To stay safe they masked traits, even though masking drained them.
Professional help often added harm; autistic-led groups and trained staff were the rare bright spots.
How this fits with other research
Gibbs et al. (2023) ran a near-identical 2023 study and found the same pattern—autistic adults call violence routine and link it to traits like people-pleasing.
Manning et al. (2026) extend the story downward: children as young as eight already feel unsafe at school and hide their autism to dodge bullies.
Bertschy et al. (2020) surveyed high-schoolers and show two-thirds believe autism hurts their school life; girls and LGBT students report the worst treatment, matching the adult theme that some groups face extra layers of harm.
Why it matters
If clients say "this always happens to me," believe them and pause any social-skills goal that teaches compliance. Swap it for assertive-refusal drills, safety planning, and autistic-led peer spaces. Push employers, police, and shelters to get autism training before you refer—poor support re-traumatises. Your most therapeutic move may be advocacy, not instruction.
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02At a glance
03Original abstract
Research suggests that autistic people are more likely to be hurt by someone they know (e.g. a friend or a family member) compared to non-autistic people. In this study, we wanted to know how being hurt by someone you know affects autistic people, and what might help them recover. In total, 102 autistic people took part in an interview, where we asked questions like how being hurt by people they know had made them feel and whether anyone they had asked for help had done a good job of supporting them. We analysed what they had said using thematic analysis, which involved reading what everyone said and looking for common themes. Our findings showed that a lot of autistic people think it is normal to be hurt by people you know because it has happened to them so much. This makes many autistic people feel like they need to mask parts of themselves to stay safe, but this also makes them really exhausted. It took some people a long time to realise what had happened to them was wrong, and it was hard to ask for help. People who did ask for help often had bad experiences with professionals (e.g. police) who did not know much about autistic people. They said better support would come from creating more autistic-run support groups and educating people about autism. These findings are important for working out how to help people who have been hurt by people they know.
Autism : the international journal of research and practice, 2023 · doi:10.1177/13623613221104546