Gender differences when parenting children with autism spectrum disorders: a multilevel modeling approach.

Jones et al. (2013) asked both moms and dads of children with autism to fill out surveys. They used a math model that lets each parent act as their own comparison. The goal was to see if child behavior problems raise parent stress, and whether moms and dads react differently.

Mothers reported more distress than fathers. When a child showed more behavior problems, both parents felt worse. The model found no special mom-only or dad-only reaction beyond the main gender gap.

Mammarella et al. (2022) later surveyed a larger group and found fathers actually show unique stress and coping styles. This extends Leah’s work by showing dads are not just “lower-scoring moms” but have their own profile.

Samadi et al. (2014) kept the mom-dad comparison and added quality of life. They agreed that distress hurts both parents, but they also found moms’ quality of life dips further when money is tight or there are more siblings.

Estes et al. (2009) looked only at moms and showed child behavior drives stress. Leah’s team echoed that link while proving the same link holds for fathers too.

When you write a behavior plan, expect mom to voice more distress than dad, but still teach both parents the same skills. Track child behavior first; lowering it helps the whole house. Add dad-specific questions to your parent interviews so you do not miss his coping style.